let’s get this show on the road

 

travel essentials - 29goingon92.com

exploding suitcase

 

I’m finally ready to go. It’s going to be tough to say the last goodbyes, but I know it’s time to get on that plane.

I will never be able to say enough thank yous to everyone who has wished the world for me. I’m going to take your words with me and think back on them whenever I need a little extra strength.

Signing off until March!

Anne


January Finds

All this touchy-feely stuff is nice in theory, but sometimes you need a few items from home to keep you sane. Lucky for me I’ll be armed with a little of everything! Below are links to a few pieces I’m taking with me. Some are great for travel, others for physical therapy, and a couple may come in handy when you’re in the hospital.

comfy {and modest} pajamas

thick socks

a plastic-free water bottle

light but warm sweater

zipper pouch to wrangle all the little things

slip-on sneakers

light-as-a-feather down jacket 

a scarf that doubles as a travel blanket

my favorite notebook

travel pillow to help me get comfortable in a weird bed

the coziest sweatpants

rash guard that’s perfect for aqua therapy

a few favorite tees

taking the good with the bad

The Color Purple "I'm Here"

 

Need a reminder that we don’t get anything good in life without having to deal with the bad? Take five minutes to watch Cynthia Erivo belt “I’m Here” in the Broadway 2015 revival of The Color Purple. Without getting too far into my theatre obsession, I’ll just tell you that not only is the message of the song beautiful, but damn does this girl have some pipes!

This song resonated with me the moment I heard it, but it took on additional meaning when I made the decision to go to a chronic pain program. As excited as I am, I know I have some really tough days ahead. Detoxing after years of taking opiates is going to be a challenge, as will rebuilding my body and mind after. And once I’m back home there will be new obstacles to face, such as figuring out how to live my life without the safety net that my medications currently provide.

But I think I finally understand what it means to be grateful for all your days, whether they’re good or bad. I am so freaking excited to live the difficult days that will come with this next phase…I think I’ve actually surpassed grateful if that’s possible! It’s not just about accepting the bad, but actually being appreciative of them.

I think that’s the secret {or one of them maybe?} to making it through each day. Actually, forget that. I don’t want to just make it; I want to be happy! Like truly deep down happy, and I want that happiness to come from within me and not be a result of what’s happening to me or going on around me.

I’m telling y’all, this girl is onto something!

And yes, I completely named my dog after this Celie. How could I resist? Don’t judge.

the reason i can’t stop smiling

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the last three scripts

 

I have written and rewritten this post over and over, but each time I give the draft a final read I delete the whole thing because my words are horrendously inadequate. How am I supposed to describe an opportunity that holds the potential to change the course of my entire life and not sound completely cliché in the process? And to think that I owe this chance to a small but mighty group of people – my family – who not only put this bug in my ear but also helped me get everything together to make it happen…and then will take on extra responsibilities in my absence! I have gone over each detail a number of times and still cannot appreciate the magnitude of what it all means, much less explain everything in a single post.

Regardless of whether I can do it poetic justice or not, two weeks from today I will travel to a hospital with a residential chronic pain treatment program. It’s a place where I won’t be the medical anomaly I’m used to being. For example, when I told the Program Director I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome he didn’t take the time to Google what that means, but rather stated confidently, “Oh yeah, we know lots about EDS around here!”

I will start treatment by detoxing from all of my pain medications. Once I accomplish that beast of a task and I’m medically stable I’ll move on to working with doctors, physical therapists, and mental health practitioners to tackle my pain from every direction. No intervention, treatment, or therapy is outside the realm of possibility. For over a month my days will be focused on nothing other than getting healthy so that when I return home I’ll be able to maintain a lower level of pain that is manageable without the use of narcotics.

During my time away I’m shirking all other responsibilities so that I can limit distractions, and that includes this blog and the 29 / 92 Instagram account. I cannot wait to share my experiences after I return, but I hope you can hold out and continue to stick with me until March. I promise that it’ll be worth the wait!

I know that this path is not one that would work for everyone; I don’t judge anyone for how they decide to care for their body. I only know that the medicines aren’t working for me, and I’m confident that I’ll be better off without them. Although I followed my physician’s orders exactly, these pills are only meant for short-term use, and I have been taking them far too long. Once they clear my system my pain should go down enough for me to start moving and begin strengthening the muscles that surround my messed up joints. And once I get that going there will be no stopping me!

After I’m discharged I’ll still have EDS and my scans and x-rays will still look the same. Those are things I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to change. I will still have some bad days and need to say no to activities I can’t manage. But I’m hoping that my pain and the time I spend in it will be markedly less and that I can begin to live a life that is not dictated by my health.

I told you 2017 was going to be my year…